God is going to get good and tired of me railing on Him when crap goes wrong. But apparently He is in a good mood at the moment, and somebody has been praying for me HARD. In the midst of my grief over losing not one, but four kittens in one day, I said some pretty serious things to Him. I meant them. Then my guardian angels stepped in and softened me up a little, and I managed to not cut my wrists.
Leo and I had serious bonding Sunday. He wanted me RIGHT THERE every second, and cried LOUDLY if I happened to make it out of his sight. We went to bed at a reasonable hour, partly because I was absolutely exhausted, and partly because I had to be on the road 5 hours later, and I HAD to get some sleep. When the alarm went off, I hit the snooze and sat up in the bed, leaning back on the pillows for a few extra winks.
Then I saw a ghost.
A little white shadow crossed the bed, and I turned on the light. Frankie and Lewis the Black curled up right there next to my leg, as if they had been there all along. Max was not with them, but Frankie went back out in the yard and got him when he heard me calling. “Mom wants you, ya little shrimp!” I heard him. Really.
*blushing*
I had screamed various “why-did-You-let-this-happen-when-I-have-this-huge-test??” kinds of things through the tears, topped off with my last cry, “If You love me, You’ll bring them home.” And He did. Minnie was still missing as of 5am, so it’s not a complete victory, but I left the window open for her just in case. Unfortunately that means the boys can take off again, but at least they’ve shown some sort of homing skills. If she came home to a closed entrance, well, I’d hate for that to happen.
I would be terribly embarrassed over my anger, but I’m too happy to know they’re safe. They shouldn’t have been. There is a pack of cat-killing dogs in the neighborhood, and since I live in the country, a guy at church happily noted they had probably been grabbed by a hawk. I’ve seen what they do to prey, and that was stuck in my head. No WONDER I was so distraught! I have such GOOOOOD friends. Criminy.
Anyway, I have a huge test Wednesday morning that consists of 6 essay questions. This can make or break graduation, so I need to do well. I need the boys to stay put until I can get home, and I would love to have Minnie back. If you happen to think about it, ask God for those things for me, k? I’m not sure I can face Him at the moment.
Later!
You’ll do fine. And your babies – so GLAD most of them have returned. Isn’t that a common thing for adolescents, disappearing to establish their independence, then returning? They’ll be fine. Our Lou learned to avoid dogs from kitten-hood.
The friend from church? Pop him in the head next time he pulls something like that. Goober.